I love veggie buffalo wings!

A little free advertising for Morning Star Farms, there. This post is inspired by Ang telling me that she was disappointed because she thought I would be a great blog-keeper. And she has the right to be disappointed. I have not updated in 16 days. Shame on me!!! This is mostly due to my inability to remember the things that I want to ramble about. I usually get genius ideas for blog posts when I'm in the car driving to and from work...but by the time I get home, they have escaped my mind. Not to mention the fact that I have become a senior citizen, as I now go to bed at 10 PM and wake up at 6 AM. I'm a little depressed right now because I can't think of a good picture to post with this blog. Maybe something will come to me as I write. In the meantime, here are some fantastic things that have happened:

• I figured out that you can use bullet points on a blog.
• Lindsey was home last weekend, and Banjo was home this weekend, so my past two weekends have been pretty cool.
• I discovered the incredible awesomeness of chai tea.
• The Olympics are over, so Scrubs will return this week!
• I got my first JH Technical paycheck. Let me just mention that I make as much in one week there as I made in two good weeks at JCPenney. AND I get paid every single week. And so far I enjoy working there. So, things are definitely looking up in the financial department.
• And speaking of work, I got an interview for a guy at one of our client companies. It's on Tuesday, so now I just have to pray that he shows up and it all goes well. hehehe.
• I paid off my Victoria's Secret bill and closed my account. Yes, I do love underwear, but there just aren't enough benefits to having that damn credit card. I will just continue to buy undewear with something that has a lower APR than 22.95%.
• I discovered the wonders of Paul Mitchell's Tea Tree Oil shampoo and conditioner. If you have never used it before, you've got to try it. It makes your scalp all tingly and minty feeling. It's like putting Noxema all over your head. Very hardcore.
• It's getting sort of close to Easter, so Easter candy is out. And that means Cadbury Mini Eggs. NOT the big ones with the disgusting sugary yolk stuff. The mini ones with the sugar shell and chocolate in the middle. Muy delicioso!

And here are some NOT so awesome things that have happened:

• Tara got the flu, so we didn't get to hang out this weekend. And I'm hoping she isn't dying.
• I figured that on Tuesday evening, I would at least get to watch Gimore Girls, since Scrubs wasn't on. But, my plans were foiled when WB decided that rather than have a new episode of Gilmore Girls prepared for my viewing pleasure, they would instead play Final Destination 2. In the words of Ang, W T Fuck? The good news is that there will be a new episode of Gilmore Girls on this Tuesday. AND Scrubs will return. So, Tuesday night will be heavenly bliss. And, on that note, this calls for an unnecessarily slutty-looking picture of my girls, and one of the men from my list of guys I would actually consider marrying. Let me just take this particular bullet point to comment on the strangeness of this picture. On the show, Lorelai and Rory never look that sexual. So, I'm not sure why the publicity photos, not to mention the introduction to the show on WB, show them looking like some kind of dominatrix vixens. But, Luke looks good. Pretty standard. I think they should of dressed him up like one of the Chip n Dales boys to keep with the pattern, however. On a fun note, Ang has informed me that my obsession with Gilmore Girls is a bit homoerotic, which I was very happy to hear. Those of you who are familiar with my undergraduate honors research know that I love homoeroticism. And just to clear the record, I'm not saying that I love gay sex, necessarily. Homoerotic doesn't necessarily mean sex. But it does have to do with intimacy. Just a short lesson on the background of the word. If you'd like to know more about Eve Sedgwick's homosocial continuum, simply drop me an IM.
• I finished watching up to disc 3 of Lost, and I won't recieve any more Netflix until Tuesday. It's an addicting show, so I'm not going through withdrawal. Damn you for not shipping movies out on Saturday, Netflix! At least I've been saving Doogie Howser, M.D. Season 3 to hold me over in my Netflix in-between times.
• I really don't have anything else bad to say. I just wanted to add another bullet point.

Okay. I hope this was enough of a post to quench Ang's thirstiness for a blog update. I'm sure that nobody else really gives a shit how often I update. But, for Ang's sake, I will try to be more consistent.

And as a P.S. I realized that I forgot to put the link to Little Nik's pictures in my last post. So, here it is: http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/gigglesha44/my_photos

Having a namesake is weird....

I really couldn't help but put this incredibly adorable picture of my namesake, Niklas Sven Abel, on here. This is currently the wallpaper on my computer. I will put the link to about a million more adorable pictures of him at the end of this post. It's strange to think that something that adorable came out of Heidi's vagina. Hahaha.

Anyway, my last two days at Penney's are going to suck ass. Tomorrow is my last day, thank God, but gauging from the horrors of today, tomorrow will be even more awful than today. The cause of this awfulness: Clearance sale and coupon sale combined. Customers who bought about a million things at $4.77 and $2.77 bought a million more things in other departments for the same prices, and then come to me and want to combine their receipts so that they can use either the $10 off a purchase of $50 or more or the $15 off a purchase of $75 or more coupons. There is no easy way to do this. I have to return everything on both receipts (sometimes there are even MORE than two receipts, DAMMIT) and then resell it all on one transaction. This is a pain in the ass. And of course, people are always convinced they are being cheated out of a dollar or two....so they rubberneck to look at the screen while I'm ringing out their clearance shit to make sure everything is ringing up at the right price. Then there are the, "Well, I found this on the $4.77 rack, but it doesn't have a $4.77 price tag on it, and it was the only one there," assholes. If it was the only one there, and it doesn't say $4.77, chances are that some shithead picked it up off of a non-clearance rack, and put it there because they were too lazy to return it to wherever they picked it up. And then there are the dressing rooms. Thank God I'm cashiering tomorrow, otherwise I might consider throwing myself off a bridge on the way to work. Most people just refuse to hang up the shit they try on. So they just throw it in a big old messy pile on the floor. So many people practice this awful habit that it's nearly impossible to keep up with them. Then people complain about how messy the dressing rooms are. In the words of Ang: W T Fuck? All of this garbage on top of the fact that Helen recently had the stomach flu, and I worked with her yesterday, and because of my weird vomit-phobia, I'm deathly afraid that I'm going to get it. And then I went in today and Connie was like, "My stomach is upset today. I think Helen got me sick." I'm trying to convince myself that Helen was better, and so I will not catch it from her. AHHHH!

And here are some other things that are pissing me off:
Why are my blog posts centered, rather than justified right like they were when I first started posting? I hate the fact that my little info thing shows up at the very bottom of my blog, rather than off to the side. I tried reformatting it, and it wouldn't work! GRRRR!
Men are emotionally unavailable and stupid.
And this isn't so much pissing me off, as just one of those weird things that I think about that wouldn't bother a normal person so much, but, for those of you who have see Garden State, do you think that Sam (Natalie Portman) and Andrew's (Zach Braff) relationship works out? I mean...do you think that they eventually end up getting married and having children and living happily ever after? Or do you think he eventually decides that she's too much to put up with and dumps her (or vice versa)? I know, I know....it's fucking fictional. But I can't help thinking about it. There is something wrong with me.
And the final thing that is pissing me off: Why doesn't anybody comment on my posts? Are you people reading this shit? I'm a headcase! Somebody say something!

Okay. That's enough for tonight. I'm off to watch my newest Netflix amusement: Desperate Housewives. It's pretty interesting, so far.

"Then it's time for her to meet Bob Kelso: Licensed hetero!"

I love Tuesdays. And this Tuesday was especially great because the State of the Union wasn't on, and my lazy-ass TV watching was completely uninterrupted. However, I must admit that Scrubs concerned me a bit tonight. I became rather fearful that Mandy Moore was going to ruin the show for me by becoming J.D.'s long-term girlfriend. I was like, "Don't cop out, Zach Braff. It would be completely and totally lame to make your real-life girlfriend your TV girlfriend." Not to mention the fact that I try to forget that Zach Braff is dating Mandy Moore at all, and having her be a part of one of my favorite TV shows as the girlfriend of one of the guys on my "Guys I Would Consider Marrying" list kind of bursts my bubble. After all, in my own little fantasy world Zach Braff is going to find me and realize that I'm the girl of his dreams. But, thank God, J.D. and Mandy Moore's character (I've already blocked her character name out of my mind) broke up by the end of the second new episode. And I breathed a sigh of relief. I mean, I don't even really have a Scrubs back-up guy I could marry....I would marry Dr. Cox, but he's pretty much taken by his ex-wife Jordan, who he has a child with, so that kind of rules him out. Dammit. However, that won't stop me from putting his picture into my blog. I must admit that Dr. Cox is a bit old for me, however. He's more Lindsey's speed HA HA HA! That was a little entertainment for those of you who know Lindsey, and most of you who will actually read this do, so be amused.

You know what I just realized? The idea Zach Braff and Mandy Moore (well, the characters that they play on a TV show, I suppose) bothers me, but the idea of Zach Braff and Natalie Portman does not, i.e. Garden State. I love that movie. In fact, I even approve of that relationship. It could have something to do with the fact that Natalie Portman is hot and awesome, and should be added to my list of people I would marry, if it weren't a list of exclusively men, which I suppose it does not have to be. So, let's go ahead and add Natalie Portman. Of course, this is only applicable in states where same-sex marriage is legal. I'm pretty sure the Garden State isn't one of them. And neither is the Keystone State, for that matter. I'm also pretty sure that I LOVE adding pictures to my blog. I'm sure you all appreciate looking at pretty pictures in between my incredibly stupid rants.

So, I spent Saturday through Monday in Washington, D.C. visiting Assface (a.k.a. Lindsey). We had a small Super Bowl Party on Sunday, which was fun. If you want to see the rest of the pictures, I'll include the link at the end, as it messes things up when I try to put it here. I'm quite happy that the Steelers won, but the game could have been mildly more exciting, in my own personal opinion. Oh well, in the words of the Rolling Stones, who, might I add, looked like absolute shit, ancient shit at that, "You can't always get what you want." But I did get something that I wanted today....just a few seconds ago, in fact. I found out that if you go to www.degreedeodorant.com, you can get a free sample of their new clear deodorant...which supposedly doesn't even leave white marks after it dries. We shall see, my friends, we shall see. I simply won't believe that it both keeps my armpits dry and doesn't leave white marks all over my clothes.

Other random thoughts:

1. I really need a haircut, and I must remember to call my hairdresser tomorrow.

2. This is my last week of work at JCPenney....WOO HOO!

3. I wish I had a bigger closet for all the clothing I've managed to accumulate.

4. I fear disease.

That's enough for now, I've tortured you enough. If you made it through, congratulations. Oh, and here's that link to pictures from the party: http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/tigersrbad/album?.dir=e10a&.src=ph&store=&prodid=&.done=http%3a//pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/tigersrbad/my_photos

"Pittsburgh's goin' to the Super Bowl!" and other exciting stuff....

It's about time for a post. I didn't have anything particularly exciting to say yesterday, so I figured I wouldn't bore whoever might read this with boring, stupid shit. So, when the hell did Ashley/Sven become interested in the barbaric American tradition of football, you ask? I'd say it was partially last year, out of boredom on Sunday afternoons in our apartment at Westminster, when Heidi was at church/out to lunch with Doc, but mostly this year, while I was in Tucson. My interest in the Steelers and football in general grew from a sort of identity crisis. The Steelers are something that the entire city of Pittsburgh gets very excited about, and, as cheesy as it sounds, it really pulls us together as a city/community. So, following the Steelers while I was in Tucson made me feel closer to home, and like I could still be a part of Pittsburgh, even though I was 2200 miles away. Once I got home, it was too late, I was already addicted. And now, I'm just as bad as anybody else in south-western Pennsylvania. Thus, I am excited about the Big Game on Sunday. I'm headed down to Washington, D.C. to "party" (if you know me, you know why that's in scare quotes) with Lindsey. But enough about my new-found football obsession. Let's focus on other good things that happened today:

1. Season Three of Doogie Howser, M.D. finally arrived!
2. I went to my new job for half a day to do some paper work/training stuff, and it seems like I made a good decision by accepting, plus they changed my salary to $1000 more a year than they originally said they would give me, which is sweet!
3. My W-2 from Advance finally came in the mail, so I e-filed my income taxes, which means more money coming my way!
4. I got the awesome "Flyin' Hawaiian" Polamalu shirts from the guy at Bella Luna (pictures of me in said shirt from Lindsey's Super Bowl party are forthcoming, of course)!
5. I did my laundry. This really isn't an exciting feat, as I usually do my laundry approximately once a week. But I like the smell of fabric softener, so I am excited.

All in all, this has been a relatively productive day. I don't even think I have anything to rant about. Except maybe the fact that we've had an unusually warm winter thus far, with very little snow. But the one weekend that I actually decide to drive somewhere, there is snow in the forecast. Hopefully this will not hinder my plans to travel to D.C., otherwise I will have something to rant about. But, enough is enough. I shall post again soon.

Doogie!

No. Season Three has NOT arrived yet. This post is in anticipation of its long-awaited arrival. In Season Three, Doogie will finally be old enough for my dating pleasure. And that makes watching the show even more enjoyable. Doogie Howser, M.D. was such a precious show. I can't understand why it only lasted four seasons. Only the good die young, I suppose. I mean, what an imaginative concept: Boy genius in his second year of medical residency at the age of 16. What's not to love? I guess it couldn't go on forever....I mean, once Doogie is actually old enough to be a doctor, the novelty kind of wears off. But what amazing characters! Doogie himself, the sexy, sultry Wanda, "horndog" (as the back of the DVD box deems him) Vinnie, and Doogie's incredibly cute parents. There is almost an overwhelming amount of preciousness in this show, I must say. And every time I watch How I Met Your Mother, I long for the cute, Doogie-esque Neil Patrick Harris, rather than his sleazebag character, Barney. But nothing lasts forever. Especially youth. And at 23, I'm feeling pretty damn old, I must say. But it could be worse, I suppose. And hey, today I finally got a job offer, and accepted. So I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that the drive to Robinson Township every day doesn't drive me crazy, and that the job turns out to be a good one. It seems like it will be, but things are not always what they seem, as I have had the unfortunate pleasure (I suppose it isn't really a pleasure, but I can't think of another word to put in there) of finding out. But this is getting too serious. I have nothing else to say right now.